Thrill Versions

[beleg]

Here is a rough draft of a song that I am working on, I
would love to get some feed back and hear what other people would add to it. I am uploading 2 versions. First a version with just drums, ukulele, piano and bass; and second a version with my feeble attempt at vocals.  I would love to hear someone else take a crack at it, either using my lyrics or writing something completely different.  The original idea was to have two singers; one
singing over part A and a different one singing over part B, but I do not have a strong attachment to that idea.

Here is the current song structure (let me know if you need
me to alter it to fit your lyrics)

Intro (part A)
Part A * 2
Part B   * 4
bridge
Part A * 2
Part B * 4
Outro (same as bridge)

[beleg]

second version with vocals

[Greeny]

There's something about this song I really like. Totally original!

Nice work.

[guitarron]

There's something about this song I really like. Totally original!

Nice work.

agreed- i like it too-nice job

[beleg]

thank you.

here are the lyrics in case anybody wanted them

Feed fear with doubt
and you'll find
that you've been..... standing still

Where's the thrill?

Trapped in your mind
Can't get out.
A silent shout
And you feel ill.

Where's the thrill?

(space for a chorus?)

You blame life on fate
This is why
You have
Dreams you can't fulfill

Where's the thrill?

Night turns to day
You bide your time
But in the end
The clock strikes nill

Where's the thrill?

(space for a chorus?)

[SteveG]

Quite an edgy song, needs that chorus tho. I cant come up with anything that fits, sure you could if you re visit it tho... Nice one!