any musicians, can you make my song "too near the sun" sound better

[Oldrottenhead]

hi ,
i've been writing songs for years but sadly i cant play guitar or keyboards for toffee, but hey that doesn't stop me, i think my lyric writing and flat voice compensate for my poor musical abilities.
so lets cut to the chase. i have a song that i have stripped back to just the basic backing track and vocal, you can hear the finished song in all it's glory here. its called too near the sun.
www.soundclick.com/thebunkbeds

but below i'm going to post the basic track for any decent musician to play over the top and perhaps enhance the song. feel free to do what you want with it, and if i really like it i will replace my version with the enhanced version at my site www.soundclick.com/thebunkbeds
the song is called too near the sun
thanks and have fun with it.

[Pedro]

Sounds very very nice. Very inspiring, I'm sure you'll get a lot of good musical ideas added on this one.

[13STARZ+]

Ok, ORH, here are my additions to "too near the sun", all i have added are a wee mellow lead guitar, and some backing vox.
hope you enjoy what i have dood with it.

[Oldrottenhead]

hehe this is great fun, not what i expected at all yer no a bad singer  by the way.
how long did it take to tune the guitar to my wavelength.

[13STARZ+]

HAHA, ye were pretty much in tune anyway.

[Oldrottenhead]

tuned to the moon



lmao

[Pedro]

Ok, ORH, here are my additions to "too near the sun", all i have added are a wee mellow lead guitar, and some backing vox.
hope you enjoy what i have dood with it.

Very nice! This is a great song, tied up with This is your story in my favorite list by The Bunkbeds.

[Pedro]

Well, finally got courage and jammed a bit with this one. Added two tracks of guitar, one rhythm and one solo. I did it over the original version and not the 13STARZ+ one because I think his version is already finished.

Hope you enjoy, I didn't add to much sounds so that other people can continue. Some strings would sound fine, I think.

Great song, you have a great talent.

[Oldrottenhead]

cool reminds me of chris isaac circa blue hotel love the wee mad solo.
cheers.

[Pedro]

cool reminds me of chris isaac circa blue hotel love the wee mad solo.
cheers.

Yes, me too! Next time I will try to be more original.