First song I've ever written - "Why"

[Gary F]

 This is a very well written song!! Nicely played and sung also!!

 Keep them coming!!!
 Gary

[des0free]

Thanks everyone!  This is very encouraging!  If anyone wants to help me improve/beef up this song send me a message.  I just posted the lyrics and chords above.  There is actually a bass track, but it's just me lamely noodling root notes, low in the mix.  I don't know how to play bass.  I also don't really know how to go about effectively adding background vocals.  And I also don't play much lead guitar. . .   Should I add a section of chords without vocals in the middle somewhere for a lead guitar break?  Where would that normally go?

[Gritter]

This song is great...I think it sounds fine as is. Keep writing and I'm sure ideas for vocal parts, bass and solos will come as you grow as a songwriter. I really like what you have done here!

[AndyR]

That's a really good first effort at songwriting!!

Definitely, DEFINITELY keep writing. Listen to songs you like and take them apart for finding out what the "rules" are about where instrumentals should be, etc.

I don't think this one really needs one.

On the backing vocals - try singing along to this one, record a few takes, see what happens. Try singing higher or lower than what's there already - especially around the chorus. I suspect that you're one of those people who can harmonise with your own voice naturally... that's roughly what I do, I only figure the notes out if what I'm doing almost works but "not quite" (and sometimes I need to figure them out so I can actually sing the part once I've pressed RECORD... somehow it all goes out the window when the Red button's pressed )

[Geir]

Can't wait to get back from the cabin to listen to this!

[antisocialworker]

yeah this is a great first song!
way to go man, keep em' comming

[RMO]

this is really good, i liked all the song, from the lyrics to the music, keep writing!

[Oldrottenhead]

keep em coming desofree great song.

[Geir]

WOW This is your first It is as Mark said FANTASTIC for a first song, ... it's a great song by any merit, but for a first it's really really good !!

You certainly have a talent for songwriting my friend !!

So now that you've broken that first barrier there's no way back !!  JUST keep'em coming !

I turned the bass to max on my monitors and still had a hard time hearing it, ... don't be shy, I do think you know what you're doing there, so for your next post turn up the bass.
If in doubt just keep the root note and follow the bass-drum on the pattern you've chosen, that usually works for most songs as a start.

[Tony W]

Very impressive song writing. The song was well constructed, and the vocals were fantastic. This is a damn sight better than the majority of "first songs" especially my own.

Excellent start on a long and fruitful journey.