everything is gone music by tommy satchwood lyrics/vox by oldrottenhead

[Oldrottenhead]

the original piece by tommy view and a glass of wine can be found here https://songcrafters.org/community/index.php?topic=5687.0 i commented that the piano reminded me of peter hammill, tried to sing like him but failed but is quite dark lyrics much like mr hammill.

its called everything is gone, hope i havent spoiled it.

[Gritter]

Great efforts put into this but to be honest, IMO it's like too much icing on the cake.

[Satchwood]

Dark lyrics - sounds like a dramatic climatic ending to a musical where the starring stage performer falls on his sword after loosing his love, his purpose for life...

[Wiley]

I was listening to this while surfing other posts. and OMG  This is so ?
ORH you and I have had our differences.  But in the name of this ?? It's wonderful!!  I don't know how we are going to keep the forum the  homey way it used to feel??  We must at least try??  It makes me sad!!

[Oldrottenhead]

it was a tight squeeze trying to fit a lyric, i had written it from the perspective of someone who has lost the love of their life but i think wiley is onto something, though it wasnt deliberate on my part, my subconcious must have slipped through on it.well spotted pj.

[Ferryman_1957]

Been in lurk mode but had to comment on this, because my "internal producer" just had to be let out. Here's how to make the icing a real complement rather than a bit too much IMVHO. The "everything is gone" repeated vox over the guitar solo does get in the way for me I'm afraid. They need to be doubled up and off to either side in the stereo, complementing the strings and leaving space for the guitar. If you add a few harmonies as that section builds it could actually add to the power of the middle section. The emotional, spoken/sung vox in the middle of the mix in the quieter sections does work IMO.

Here's a niggle - the first line is a bit weak, both in impact and singing. The third line that starts "Memories..." is so much better. Any chance you could strengthen the lyric and come in a bit stronger? I always struggle with the first line of vox btw. Also, there might be a bit of clipping on some of the vox in the first section (I'm getting it on my Sennheisers which are pretty good but it is a PC soundcard).

Jim, hope you don't mind the comments, I think this has great potential but it needs more sympathetic production. I definitely hear Peter Hammill btw.

Cheers,

Nigel

[Oldrottenhead]

cheers nigel, was a difficult one to do, especially around tommy's awesome guitar work, i might knock heads with tommy and see if we can redo this one or something similar, am not 100% happy with it either but wanted to give it a go, i tried and failed lol. re the repeated everything, i should have done it once or twice and let tommy go off on one as was my intention but once i started singing i got a bit caught up in it.

[Ferryman_1957]

cheers nigel, was a difficult one to do, especially around tommy's awesome guitar work, i might knock heads with tommy and see if we can redo this one or something similar, am not 100% happy with it either but wanted to give it a go, i tried and failed lol. re the repeated everything, i should have done it once or twice and let tommy go off on one as was my intention but once i started singing i got a bit caught up in it.

No, you didn't fail (that's too harsh) but the cigar is not quite alight IMO.....

Know what you mean about getting caught up in something. Tharek sent me a beautiful piece which he wanted some bass on and I kept retaking it because every time I was just adding too many notes and making it too complex (just got carried away each time I heard it), I kept stripping it back until it's little more than root notes. Dull bass playing but it complements the song better. So the "everything is gone" would work IMO if it was more a 10cc "wall of vox" that blended with the strings.

Cheers,

Nigel

[Bluesberry]

But damn, there is some power here ORH.  I am getting chills and shivers listening to this.  This is worth taking another run, it is stirring the way it is.  I think its to do with the levels and maybe some of the panning ideas Nigel talks about.  But the channelling of Mr.Hamill works for me, great vocal performance.  Just needs a little spit and polish and this is truly a monster song in the Dream Theater vein.

[Satchwood]

I definitely see some great potential here on this!  !

I'll revisit this and maybe strip some of the business off or maybe come up with a new or revisied arrangment, better suited for vox. 

I like how you poor your heart out in the vocals on the 'everything is gone' - I sense lots of emotion on this!