My Cat

[Ray Brookes]

She likes her kippers in the morning though it makes her breath smelly
Only eats the best food from the very best deli
She lays on my lap when I'm sitting watching telly
I'm allowed to rub her ears but not to touch her belly

My cat. Don't exercise but never gets fat
My cat. Sly as a fox and sneaky as a rat
My cat. Walks around likes she's really all that
She likes to get a little stroke but don't care for a pat

Her milk has to be polyunsaturated
I shudder at the monster that I have now created
A glare that would strip lead paint right off a door
Twice a day I change her litter or she craps on the floor

My cat. Got her own chair don't care for a mat
My cat. Condescends to live here in my flat
My cat. An only child the quintessential spoiled brat
I could see her in a smoking jacket with paisley cravat

She meows and meows until she gets what she wants
Maybe they would take her in that Chinese restaurant   
Sometimes I get evil and on a quiet afternoon
I pick up my sitar and play my favourite tune

"How Much Is That Doggie In The Window"

And when her nine lives are up and I have to dig her grave
I gotta dig another hole close by for her slave
But when we're reborn and she thinks she is a leopard
She'll be horrified to see that I've got a German Shepherd

My cat. Sleeps and eats has a stretch and a spat
My cat. Likes to pee on my very best mat
My cat. Looks at me as if to say 'What are you looking at?'
One day, one day I'm gonna get my cricket bat ... owzat?

Anybody want a free cat?

[StephenM]

Wow....you are full of surprises!  Fanflippintastic!  Lyrics off the charts and the vox in the chorus.... creativity in major form!  Wow.

[thetworegs]

loved it ....I've got one just like it ...it still has nothing to do with us since we got Monty the lab

[Frank53]

Love this, Ray. Very creative. Excellent rhyme scheme, and great story. Terrific arrangement, and vocals. Nice polyrhythmic outro, with those vocals in 5.

[chapperz66]

Brilliant, Ray.  There can't be many songs with polyunsaturated in the lyrics. and you made it rhyme. Love the Indian section.

At the risk of attracting group disapproval - I'm not a cat lover.  But I love this song.

Paul

[Mike_S]

Super Ray... this is a corker. Cats... hmmm strange creatures. We have 2. Annoying little buggers. Wonderful lyrics and those cat and doggie noises are great little additions...

Mike

Here is one of ours outside the other day...

[Ray Brookes]

Wow, Mike that cat of yours looks so stressed out! (not).

[TPB]

Thanks brother glad I did not miss this one laughing my ass off at work
Well done
Tim

[hardlock]

Very inventive!  It's just purrrrrfic!

[Ferryman_1957]

This is simply wonderful Ray! Humourous but beautifully written, arranged and played. I'm a cat owner and you had me laughing out loud in several places. And the sitar break in the middle (never thought I would type those words) is amazing! It's both hysterically funny and musically brilliant. I love the cat sounds you have woven in to this and the production is great, fab use of the stereo field.

Huge fun and a belter of a track. Well done!!!