A personal question about audience/support.

[averiguar]

I'm a little disappointed by the lack of support from friends and particularly family members around me. The last two posted songs my girlfriend and I have worked on, doing the best we can with our dubious skill sets, yet we get REALLY severe indifference from people on facebook who we thought would support us unconditionally regardless of thier opinions on the music itself.
But nothing. No, worse than nothing, -a yawning chasm of blithe disregard!
Is it just US, or do any of you out there also experience such negativity from those closest to you in regards to your songs?

[phantasm777]

happens to me all the time, especially on FB. family best friends, friends, acquaintances. I rarely ever get a comment, not even bad ones. so I just said fuck it and i'm going to make music and post it anyways. turns out you cannot always count on the ones you thought would support you the most.
just hang in there and don't let it bother you. you know if you are progressing or getting better and that's all that matters. I could never understand the apathy from those closest to "you" but you cannot let it bother you or it will fuck up your musical journey!

[Hook]

I'm not a fan of Facebook or all the social media bullshit but I guess it can be a useful (perhaps necessary) tool if you know what your doing. As far as support, what do you want, criticism, kind words, money & if it's just from your friends does it really matter, I guess the $$ would. Are you there cheering on your friends hobbies, do you go to your work buddies softball games? Do you get all into what book your facebook friends really enjoying? After 15 years of marriage my wife doesn't want to listen to any of my tunes anymore, it used to bother me but now I kinda understand. I send some tunes to some of my old musician friends and they might respond or not, it's cool either way. I feel pretty confidant that selling $0.99 tracks online isn't going to support my family. I guess my point is, don't write & record music for some expected response or praise, you will most likely be disappointed. Write from your heart, record & share it for the love of music. If you want fans & or $$$ you really need to preform every chance you get & shmoooze like there is no tomorrow. I hate shmooozing!
Rock On!

[Greeny]

The trouble with most people (including friends and family) is that they have absolutely no idea how much effort goes into writing and recording songs. And listening - I mean properly - listening to a song takes too much effort for many. They'd rather just click a 'like' button on a picture of a cat playing a piano.  They also wouldn't know what to say in terms of constructive feedback, because they're not like us. That's why this is such a great community. We all 'get it'. We all struggle for recording time, get writers block, battle with technology, get insecure about our talent, have constant GAS, piss off our loved ones with our 'hobby', and search for beautiful mistakes. You can't expect your social media circle to be like that.

I gave up a long time ago on most of my friends and wider family being interested in my songs. In fact, I've accepted that they are actively NOT interested and never have been. My son and girlfriend are though, and that's all that matters really.

Don't let it bother you. As Hook says - do it for yourself, and stay true to yourself.

[Hilary]

Oh this is really interesting as it used to upset me, the lack of support from family and friends. Something as simple as 'liking' my Facebook page, for example. Takes absolutely no effort at all but some of my friends still haven't even done that (including my sister!). My mum thinks I should sell my songs and let someone else perform them (but then she's never seen me perform). Oh and absolutely everybody, every single person I know was dead against me going down the comedy route when I started out.

I will say though - that my husband (and he's the one that matters) always comes to my gigs and believes in me 100% (he doesn't BS). He never moans about how much it costs or how much time it takes up and will do everything in his power to support me in my endeavours. I really don't think I'd still be trying now, if it wasn't for my husband.

You and your girlfriend need to believe in what you do - that's all that really counts. If you want to make money, Hook's right - you have to perform as much as you can and get out there and hustle. It's relentless. Oh and be prepared to be ignored, because that's how it works until someone thinks they can make some money out of you.

[Oldrottenhead]

i think re posting your songs on facebook is the same the world over, folk just ignore them.

well they have good reason to with mine.

 i've even been unfriended for posting songs on friends facebook page. 

 my wife doesn't even listen to my songs, even the ones i write for her.

so now i generally just link my songs on my own facebook page.

as a result i do get a lot of listens but not much feedback.

but i write songs cos i have to, it's like breathing lol. if folk say they like them, then that to me is a bonus, it can be encouraging but is not my reason d'etre for writing them in the first place.

however whenever i post a new picture of my dog i get lots of feedback.

aha that's what i should do post dog pic and new songs in same thread.

but like has been said earlier do it for yourself, and stay true to yourself.

[danieldesete]

They'd rather just click a 'like' button on a picture of a cat playing a piano.

Even youtbe vids give very little feedback, sometimes someone takes the effort to tell you you are a big sh*t, and that's hardly it.
Most people think the aim is to become a rock star, and it's hard to explain the purpose is just to have a good time producing good music. They understand selling, not sharing.
And after all, people swallow drugs to be street corner champions 

That's why this is such a great community.

Community is the word, but here too you have to give feedback if you really want some for your music no?... And and really appreciate the benevolent spirit going on here on this site

[steelguitar]

The trouble with most people (including friends and family) is that they have absolutely no idea how much effort goes into writing and recording songs. And listening - I mean properly - listening to a song takes too much effort for many. They'd rather just click a 'like' button on a picture of a cat playing a piano.  They also wouldn't know what to say in terms of constructive feedback, because they're not like us. That's why this is such a great community. We all 'get it'. We all struggle for recording time, get writers block, battle with technology, get insecure about our talent, have constant GAS, piss off our loved ones with our 'hobby', and search for beautiful mistakes. You can't expect your social media circle to be like that.

I gave up a long time ago on most of my friends and wider family being interested in my songs. In fact, I've accepted that they are actively NOT interested and never have been. My son and girlfriend are though, and that's all that matters really.

Don't let it bother you. As Hook says - do it for yourself, and stay true to yourself.

Totally agree with it.
I think that friends, family who are nor musicians or music lovers (in french, we say "mélomanes") can not appreciate the efforts "goes into writing and recording songs". Very few persons are able to listen to properly a song, a composition. So, on facebook, close family friends or not, it is the same.

As said Daniel for a conclusive word, "And really appreciate the benevolent spirit going on here on this site".

Jean-Sébastien

[IanR]

I have a similar story.............

I started to think that some of my songs were actually worth talking about with friends and family so I gave out about 10 CDs to extended family members last Christmas as a stocking filler.

No feedback at all.  My brother, who is an "artist", didn't even respond.  Nothing.

I wasn't really surprised and I was not very disappointed.  It would have been nice to get some praise or even for someone to tell me that they hated it (I'd know they listened to it) but ultimately, I do it for myself and it gives me pleasure and I hope that it will stop me getting doddery as I get old(er). 

My work is very objective and analytical so music is a change of pace that balances off my brain and keeps me sane, and human.

BTW I think that most of the songwriters and performers on this site are fantastic.  I've said it before that some people have really developed over the past 2 years to the point where I'd rather listen to music from this site than go to the music shop for a commercial CD.

[Redler]

I've been thinking the next issue; if I post photos on Facebook it'll get easily several likes. When posting my own music videos or songs, the folk doesn't comment or like that much. Propably, they don't listen to or watch them...it can be found out easily via YouTube stats.

The photo is more "easy", you can see in a few seconds what is all about, but listening to music takes time. I always get at least couple likes from non Songcrafter members (SC Facebook friends doeasn't count, 'cos we always support each other   ), but I post less than 10 songs/year.

Likewise Ian, I gave a CD as Christmas present to two of my friends and no feedback at all. Then, last Christmas I gave Haltia CD to an old lady who lives at the next door. A few days later she stopped me, hugged me and told that she was very moved about our CD and she had played CD to her relatives and they had liked it, too. That was the best feedback I've got ever!