.. walk into a bar, ...

[badrail]

1. A Priest, a Rabbi and a Minister walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this a joke?"
2. A skeleton walks into a bar, orders a beer, and a mop.
3. A Crustaceon walks into a bar and asks, "Do you serve Crab here?" The bartender answers, "We serve anybody here."
4. Three guys walk into a bar, the fourth one ducks.
5. A Texas Adgie walks into a bar with a pig under his arm, the bartender asks, "Where did you get that?" The Pig answers, "I won him in a raffle."
6. A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "Why the long face?"
7. A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge".
8. A hamburger walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve food here..."
9. A guy walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?" The bartender shakes his head and says, "No, we only have plain."
10. (and for all us musicians on here...): E-flat walks into a bar, The bartender says, sorry, we don't serve minors......

Feel free to add on to this!!

11. (couldn't resist):  Thomas Edison walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Okay, I'll serve you a beer, just don't get any ideas."

[Blooby]

I don't get 9, and it's driving me nuts.

[badrail]

Plain (airplane...) it took me awhile also. Thanks for the response, I needed a little humor on this "already starting out to be a crappy Monday" morning................

[kenny mac]

A white horse walks ino a bar and the bartender says "Hey we've got a drink named after you" and the horse says "What......  Eric?

[Blooby]

Plain (airplane...) it took me awhile also. Thanks for the response, I needed a little humor on this "already starting out to be a crappy Monday" morning................

Doh!  They say that puns are the lowest form of humor. This does not bode well for my current state of cognition.

Blooby

[Hilary]

A horse walks into a bar and says ouch!

[64Guitars]

5. A Texas Adgie walks into a bar with a pig under his arm, the bartender asks, "Where did you get that?" The Pig answers, "I won him in a raffle."

A woman and a duck walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig."

The woman says, "That's not a pig, it's a duck."

The bartender says, "I was talking to the duck."

[64Guitars]

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman are sitting in a bar in New York reminiscing about home.

"Back in me pub in Glasgow," brags the Scotsman, "fer every four pints of stout I order, they give me one fer free!"

"In me pub in London," says the Englishman,"I pay fer two pint's o' Guiness and they give me a third one free!"

"That's nuthin'" says the Irishman, "In my pub back in Dublin, you walk up to the bar, they give you the first pint fer free, the second pint fer free, the third pint fer free -- and then they take you upstairs and you have sex for FREE!"

"Is that true?" asks the Scotsman. "Has that really happened to you?"

"Well, no," says the Irishman, "but it happens to me sister all the time!"

[Oldrottenhead]

a guy walks into a bar and stands on a shit. a guy comes in behind him and stands on same shit. "i just did that", he says. wallop!

a guy says to bartender can i use your toilet. of course you can says bartender. it's just i take salts says the guy. no probs says barmen.
later the barman goes into the toilet, there is shit on the floor, the ceiling , the walls , the mirrors it's everywhere. barman see guy that asked to use toilet and asks . what kind of salts do you fucking take.




"summersaults" sez guy.

[Hilary]

The barre leaves the bar because of the rest.

When a barre leaves the bar, is he barred?