Music FAILS

[64Guitars]

I've been a fan of FAILBlog.org for a while. Tonight I noticed that they have a new Music FAILS site:

http://music.failblog.org/

Might be worth bookmarking and visiting now and then for a laugh.









Fender Eric Crapton guitar



Ocarina multitrack (this is a WIN, not a fail)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMJBGCC6akc


Stradivarius Island  (definitely a WIN)









WIN!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7MoWPTeYS4

[64Guitars]

I like this one because I've never understood the purpose of a conductor. He stands with his back to the audience waving a little stick around in the air. Nobody in the orchestra seems to pay any attention to him. They're either reading their sheet music or they're deeply into the music with their eyes closed. So how come the concert reviews all praise the conductor instead of the incredibly talented and skilled musicians in the orchestra? To me, the conductor is neither use nor ornament. I'd much rather watch the musicians than the dork with the little stick.

[64Guitars]

The Marshall stacks are just for show. The guitarist actually plays through a Micro BR and then into the PA.

[64Guitars]

[Greeny]

All very good! Especially the last one - 'aint that the truth.

[launched]

"Being a Drummer" - My fave, because it takes the heat off me!

[Flash Harry]

I love that 'being a drummer' - It's so true.

A metronome. Spot on.

[64Guitars]

They take a poke at bass players too.

[bruno]

I like this one because I've never understood the purpose of a conductor.

Okay - this I think I can explain. Having played in Orchestra (purely amateur), the purpose of the conductor is quite complex. Most of the work is done in rehearsals, almost like a training coach. I have a theory that the original composers were the first programmers, music notation is code, the conductor is the clock - the players are highly trained parts of the machine, and respond to events (the beat) controlled by the conductor. However a totally regular beat is not very musical, so the conductor shapes the music. Speed, loud, soft, aggressive, mild etc. If you listen to classical - its constantly changing time, all the time. All conductors are accomplished musicians in their own right, and spend a lot of time explaining the intent of the music, or the story behind, so that the orchestra plays the piece as the conductor interprets it. They also read all the parts of an orchestra at the same time (this is the score - I struggle reading 1 stave - they will read 30 at the same time and cue in instruments, correct mistakes and ensure that the solo instrument are playing at the correct volume - all via body language. Full orchestra can be up to 100 players - so controlling that rabble is quite a task. I saw a comment that nobody watches the conductor, that's because players look using their peripheral vision. Reading music are watching the conductor is quite a skill, and something I always struggled with - if you loose concentration, you are dead in the water - then comes faking it till you find your place. Some conductors are bloody hard to follow. An orchestra without a conductor would be a mess! Conductors train for years - and are pretty amazing - its like a master organ player controlling this instrument which is in fact the orchestra. I will say - sat in the middle of an orchestra playing is a pretty awesome experience.

One thing to add - musical notation doesn't do modern music and modern rhythms at all well. That coz modern music sits a little behind the beat - and improvisation is a totally alien experience for the classical musician. It is completely outside formal music training - and makes them sweat real bad! So if classical musician is winding you up, just say - "lets jam" :-)

[OsCKilO]

  


A big Ocarina full of Win!