Blank Pt1

Started by thetworegs, June 18, 2011, 03:57:38 AM

thetworegs

I'm playing about with different formats trying to find out how to tell the story.....ok...ok...ok  enough of the pretentious bull, your experimenting....your having a go......yes Reg you could say that................I'm trying
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............You certainly are.

BLANK Pt1
   
If Life is a dream then use your imagination

T.C. Elliott

It's like a minimalist arrangement to start. I'm not sure I like having just street sounds under the spoken word. Maybe keep the music track under it but very very low and stop very briefly before the second part.

The second musical section needs development or maybe more space to hear the music a bit more.

The third section musically might be my least favorite of the first three, but I like the way the vox works against it. Fits very well. Again too short. Not quite developed well enough. (Maybe having a 12 minute post keeps each section from being too long?)

Fourth section... cool (relaxed, sunglasses at night outside of a jazz club cool) right from the start. No lyric which is fine, but I think it could be developed a bit more.

Fifth: A cross between a jazz workout and a rainy day, dream away Jimi kind of feel.

Sixth: ooh,, percussion is good. I like percussion. And horns. I like them too.

Flying through the clouds...

Seventh: I like the piano, and while I don't think it describes the beauty of the final scene, it does convey the excitement or energy of scene.

Overall, I think you've got a lot of great ideas here. I think it works, but it seems to be like the radio edit where I think I'm hearing a full album. It reminds me greatly of Nilssons 'The Point.' I love 'The Point' so maybe I'm expecting too much? I hope I'm not basing my expectations unfairly on a comparison.

Your ambition and vision are greater than I would/do have and the execution is far from lacking. Pretty damn fine job, I love the creativity here.
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thetworegs

Thanks for your critic T.C i agree with everything said. This is just a rough sketch looking at one of the ways i can start this musical story it's a kind of wild animal i'm trying to tame with no knowledge of how. But its fun trying to find the road without the map. I'll have to check Nilssons "The Point" out as i haven't heard of it before. Thanks again
   
If Life is a dream then use your imagination

launched

Dude, I love this kind of show! The most I've ever gone was three segments, and that took collaboration. I appreciate T.C.'s comments, he put full attention to it. I'm going to listen to it again and I think it's a great work in progress.

You should continue to tweak this and add/subtract because it will be well worth it. I think you are on to something here.
"Now where did I put my stream of thought. But hey, fc*K it!!!!!!! -Mokbul"
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Bluesberry

really good comments from TC.  Thats good advice.  I like the scope, the grandeur.  For me, I love multi part songs, but I always feel the music needs a lot of variety between parts to keep the interest going.  Like different styles entirely.  You are definitely going in this direction, I don't really know what I would do here.   I greatly admire your creativity, vision, grand poetic brushstrokes.  It needs some bass and guitar and Hammond organ, thats what it may need.  Delicious stuff Reg-man.

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thetworegs

#5
I had scribble down a bit more of the story so here goes. Done in the same format as Pt1 but it's all going to change as the story formulates.......i'm just sketching at the moment the oil painting comes later.....much later
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BLANK Pt2 2nd remix
   
If Life is a dream then use your imagination

FuzzFace

This is a really cool concept.  I had some ideas myself for songs by a fictional character.  There should be a board on this site for schizophrenic music.  Ha ha


Your music is really well-done.

SwanSong

JUST superb once again very creative. regards NEIL !

thetworegs

#8
More of Reg's Musical soap Opera with a few more tunes...................Trouble finds Reg
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BLANK Pt 3
   
If Life is a dream then use your imagination

FuzzFace

Hey... if you are open to suggestions (I hate the word criticism), I have lost track of which part it is, but the part about people-watching in lieu of drinking, I like the idea a lot but for me the idea is repeated in the lyrics too many times.  Perhaps it could be varied by expressing it idiomatically (e.g. "I am a hawk looking at the world from a bird's eye view", or "Life is a spectator sport" or "I'm in the zoo and the stores are the cages"); or throw in some backstory details that explains why he is so stimulated by this, or what it is about people-watching that makes it a suitable replacement for alcohol; or throw in some details that are apparently unrelated... just to colour it a little.

Anyway this is a very inspired and inspiring project!