In The Night Of My Revelation (ambient/spacy)

[Donna D]

Well. Make of this what you will.    During FAWM (finishes on Feb. 28), there was a challenge to write something using stream-of-consciousness. Though the lyric/poem isn't entirely SOC, I did need to slip into a kind of "altered state" where nothing was planned. The images simply tumbled out.

I narrated the piece a cappella, and Paul (I need to get his surname) came along and created a soundscape.

Anyway, something a bit different.  

Donna

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In The Night Of My Revelation

In the night of my revelation
I dreamed I held a crystal ball
And all the gypsies in the world
Flowed like a river to my door
And more than I could number
Of prophets and oracles, vendors
Of miracles, makers
Of a mythology soon twisted into truth
That bled like wine into the mouths
Of captive generations
Choked them with bread expanding
To fill the space that needs
No nourishment other than
What the heart and mind can provide
And I awoke troubled, but the moon
Reaching through the window
Pinned my shoulder to the bed
And I fell back into a fevered slumber

And in my dream
I watched angels
Disenfranchised
Spill like tears down
The face of the moon
Silent as death
And as bleak as
A baby's last breath

When I awoke my pillow was wet
But slivers of radiance pierced the floor
So I stumbled outside
Where the sun hung like a ripe lemon
And the sky was the blue of a robin's egg
And I scooped up satiny rose petals
Wet and wind-swept, scattered on the grass
Flung them into the air, joyful
Where they danced and fluttered
Pink and soft inside the ball of glass

©2011 Donna Devine

[launched]

Wow, what a vision! You picked the right music to put your spoken words to as well!

Love it!


Mark

[Bluesberry]

One of the most wonderful things I have heard in a while.  Super-fine poetry here.  WOW.

[Facemask93]

Nice verse Donna , spoken beautifully , wrapped in a fine soundscape

Rob

[stoman]

Donna, you are a master of words. Honestly, I have not met any lyricist yet who could hold a candle to you.

The soundscape fits nicely too.

Regardsy
  Steffen

[Nelson]

Simply an outstanding piece of writing, Donna.

You are a real pro.

Paul has done an excellent job on the sound scape.

[Ferryman]

Love the combination of spoken words and soundscape - it works really well. One criticism - it's too short! I think you could have taken your time and even repeated some sections. But it must have been hard doing it a capella without the sounds!

I see you've heard my "Tears in Rain" track (thanks for the kind words) so you'll know I love this kind of thing. And I loved this! Very atmospheric.

Cheers,

Nigel

[Donna D]

Thank you all so much for your kind comments. I feel quite moved by them, in fact. 
I wasn't sure whether to even post this, as it's quite different from the usual fare here.

Good of you all to be open to listening. 

Nigel: Interestingly, a couple of other people have commented it should be longer. 
Yes, the a cappella thing was kind of touch and go. I had to practice quite a few times to make sure I didn't run out of breath in particular places. All good exercise, though.

Donna